Friday, 14 September 2012

Jamie, Tom, Callum - Newdale Primary

looking behind me i saw....

A humungous  monster appeared behind me which was staring at me with is big gloomy eyes. the monster is green like the grass, and when breathing fire burst out of is mouth. THE FIRE  was hot as
lava the monster was as green as envy if he ever strikes at you it would be game over for you. when you foot goes eny were nere the dragon he will burn you foot.you need to run if you see this terrible monster. this monster is found in a bush or mostily camoflauged in a tree if you see someone struggling help to save a life. this monster is a deadily venomous



3 comments:

  1. To Jamie,Tom and Callum

    Well done I really enjoyed you story it was fantastic .The best part was probaly where you put'...A humungous monster apeared behind me which was'. Next time try to use a capital I apartfrom that It's brillant,I also like the part where you use capital letters on'THE FIRE'

    your friends www.6d.2012highlawnprimary.net

    ReplyDelete
  2. I liked your story it was like i did'nt want to meet the monster but there were quite a lot of mistakes there were spelling mistakes,no spaces and the vcop was'nt very good some of it was and there were no full stop at the end
    by reece no






    ReplyDelete
  3. I love the story ideas. Well done.

    Madeleine
    your teacher is my dad

    ReplyDelete