Friday, 14 September 2012

Lauren, Isabella, Lena-Paige - Newdale Primary

......looking behind me I saw........

a masive,colourful fairground. With a rollercoaster that did loop de loop and tips you upside down.
I ran towards some orange bumper cars with a scarlet red flame. Next to it was a pole with many seats going across it going up and down rapidly. I could smell a warm melting cheeseburger on a hot barbecue. As I looked around I saw many people with beaming smiles on their faces. Then a glowing circus tent rose from the


  1. What a great story! I really enjoyed reading it today while working on the International Space Station. I don't often get to read many stories up here and I do miss fairgrounds and cheese burgers!

    I could start my own story like this - Looking behind me I saw the planet Earth...

    Captain Lewis T. Button (NASA)

  2. Just read this. It is great.

    Madeleine A

  3. Ohh you have made me really hungry! I hope its nice weather for a BBQ this weekend. I like the way you have described the beaming smiles and glowing tent lovely imagery.

  4. Really enjoyed this. You've used very sensual language. My favourite is the 'warm, melting cheeseburger'... mmmmmmm :)

  5. Dear Lauren,

    Having just read your 100 word challenge, I have to say I am very impressed. You have used excellent description to not only describe what you can see but what you can smell. Making your story about a fairground is quite unique. Why did you choose this topic.

    I look forward to reading your work in the future. Keep up the excellent writing.

    Mr Foster - Shrewsbury International School